Top 10 Reasons for Olympia 2012 in Moscow

eXile:"

1. Russians pay the biggest bribes
2. Only city with a Night Flight
3. Long gap in Olympiskii Stadium's schedule between the annual Uriah Heep and Maxidrom concerts
4. We will do whatever Maria Sharapova asks us to
5. They'll totally fuck it up, hopefully ending this vastly overrated event for good
6. Every second Muscovite is a security guard, meaning safety is 'no problem'
7. Sheremetyevo's remodeling should be ready by then
8. Russian commentators will no longer be able to blame Russophobia if their teams lose
9. Strict visa regime will mean lots of empty seats and cheap tickets from scalpers
10. Expected massive influx of Ukrainian whores to service Olympics will lead to supply glut and post-Olympics Games firesales of whores, like 'Crazy Vasya's Clearance Sale -- We're Givin' 'Em Away!' "